Love; one of the most widely written about topics in the world and yet, surprisingly, to this date we still do not have a universally acceptable definition of love.
Is it what we see in the movies – a passionate attachment between two people – the dizzy-room-is-spinning kind of feeling and your stomach is filled with butterflies. We have been taught that falling in love with someone is about “following our heart, not our mind” that love by definition is “mystical and beyond reason”. But if it is really love that we feel then we do feel it for a reason. The reason may not be conscious or accessible but it does exist.
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There are many quotes, phrases, songs, poems, books and stories about love. Each giving a new answer to the question, what is love? The following quote came from Louis de Bernières,~Captain Corelli’s Mandolin
“When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness; it is not excitement. That is just being in love, which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love, itself, is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn’t sound very exciting does it? …but it is.”
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I find the problem with movies is that most of them are about “where love begins”. It’s the LIVING-HAPPILY-EVER-AFTER part that poses the greatest challenge. It’s after “the sunset” where love and commitment start. What helps us stay in a nurturing relationship is continuing to put as much effort into nourishing it as we did finding it.
Like many before us we will try and answer the question of love but like all of them we will each have our own answer for that which holds us together.
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